First "space lawyer" dooms humanity to an earth-bound fate

The first "space lawyer" has graduated, which probably means humanity is now doomed to an earth-bound fate. MichaelDodge, the newly minted lawyer to the stars--not the high paying type of stars out in Hollywood, mind you--says that he was initially curious as to why "space needed regulation." But luckily for him, and to the future detriment of all who dream of humanity throwing off the shackles of earth, he got over such non-lawyerly worries and showed his right stuff by embracing the final legal frontier.

All I can add is don't look to me to write about space lawyers anytime soon, unless it's in connection to some alien monster needing a space lawyer's stomach to explode out of.